Male Teenagers, Young Adults, & Protracted Teenagers Engage In Overt Sexual Displays In Order To Compensate... For Not Knowing, Especially Sexually
Sara Robinson addresses this in her article The Real Deal versus PoserWorld.
LowerManhattanite hits at it in Do NOT Mess With An Original Gangsta.
Hubris Sonic makes the point clear and all you need do is look at the pictures in Blackwaters' Mercenary Navy?. He spells it out explicitly in Putin tells Cheney to go fuck himself, so if you didn't get the point already or if the Red Sox pitching Curt Shilling in Game Six has you drinking heavily, there's still hope.
Because here it is yet again. (The full article is an absolute must read.)
Orcinus (Sara Robinson)Hmmmm.
Which brings me around to my point, which is that the over-the-top behavior around masculine gender roles Digby and Dave are noticing is pretty classic early primary behavior, too. The games boys play at this age often involve extreme masculine archetypes -- cowboys, cops, soldiers, sports heroes, spacemen, and so on. (It's interesting that Little Boots has, at one time or another, tried to cast himself in all of these roles -- and that the male Kewl Kids just swooned over it, every time. Remember the fuss over Jet Pilot Action Figure Bush's "package"? Damn fool didn't loosen his straps before getting out of the jet. Nobody else on the deck had his crotch trussed up like a Christmas goose; and to them, he looked like a rookie idiot. But Chris Matthews practically had an orgasm on-air while watching him prance and strut.) The fact that so many mainstream and conservative media guys are suckered by this posturing shows that they don't really have a clue about what a Real Man looks like -- though, somewhere deep down inside, they're pretty sure they don't qualify. That's why they're so easily wowed by men who can put on the costume and make it look good.
But they're even more easily cowed by men who can actually fill the boots. John Kerry. John McCain. Colin Powell. Bill Clinton. (You don't have to agree with their politics; but nobody can say these men haven't comfortably worn the full measure of male power and responsibility for some critical stretch of their lives.) Like little boys, the media guys are so awed by the outward forms of masculinity that they eagerly make a fetish out of them; but they also actively fear and resent men who display the authentic internal goods that make an honest-to-God man. These guys' very presence incites such a strong sense of personal inadequacy that the Boys On The Bus can only resort to attacking them in ways that are openly calculated to feminize them -- that is, to bring them down to their own level. He look French. He's whipped by his powerful wife. He's preoccupied with his hair. Translation: This guy has more balls and more maturity than we do -- and we need to take him down before everybody figures out how inadequate that makes us feel.
Whatever the "real" content of manhood is (that's a whole separate discussion), sexual agency and virility lie somewhere near the core of it. It takes a sexually mature and capable man to find and woo a partner, father children, sustain the relationships that make a home, and take his place among the valuable men of the community. When you're a kid, Dad's sexual competence is the very heart of what makes him the alpha male in your family pack. At five or six, the physical attributes that make him a man are magical stuff -- and not only do you not have those attributes, your childish sense of time is such that it's easy to fear that you never will. The whole issue, as Freud knew, is fraught and uncomfortable. The only way little boys can deal with this deep and mysterious discomfort is to make giggly jokes about it. It's either that, or stand in dumbstruck awe about the power that your young life utterly depends on, yet you simply cannot comprehend -- and that's not an option on prime time TV.
The howling conservative and MSM men we're seeing on the air these seem to be stuck in some early sexual stage -- a stage where manliness and sexuality are scary adult mysteries, the obsessive stuff of wild curiosity, rampant misunderstandings, crude jokes, dress-up play-acting, and bizarre fetishes. For all their media power, these guys have sexually scarcely moved beyond playing doctor-- and, at this late stage, probably never will. Scratch any leering old man, and you'll expose a scared kid who, fifty years on, still hasn't come to terms with his own uncontrollable wet dreams, let alone the challenge of engaging productively with his own adult sexuality and that of the real-life adult women he shares the world with.
There's more...
Just a few sentences of that again please, and let's tighten. Lots.
(While the sentences, well, the words anyway, remain sequential, I'm tightening up bunches, playing fast and loose with Sara's words as I delete stuff to make my meaning, throwing in extra periods, commas, and such, changing a bit of the grammar [in brackets] to pull four long paras down to three damn short ones.
I believe the heart of what I'm saying out of Sara's words is consistent with her post, but what is below is absolutely no longer what she said. It's me, using her words massively edited, to make my point. I take full responsibility for what is being said.
Why didn't I just make my own damn point then? I did. Just needed her words to do it. Sara's original piece was so good she clearly owned the space. Said differently, I couldn't get her magnificent turn of words and sequence (which is often much more important than the words) out of my head fast enough for anything else to show up before deadline. So I borrowed it (with attribution), edited it, and played word-collage without taking a single word out of sequence or adding any words except clarifying grammar. Go me! The result is... Well, judge for yourself...)
The games boys play at this age often involve extreme masculine archetypes. The fact so many guys are suckered by this shows they don't really have a clue what a Real Man looks like -- though, somewhere deep down inside, they're pretty sure they don't qualify. They're easily cowed by men who actually fill the boots comfortably, [have] worn the full measure of male power and responsibility for some critical stretch of their lives.Maori Haka
Virility and Dad's sexual competence is the very heart of what makes him the alpha male. The physical attributes that make him a man are magical stuff -- and not only do [they] not have those attributes, [their] sense of time is such it's easy to fear [they] never will. The issue is uncomfortable deep mysterious power [their] life utterly depends on, yet simply cannot comprehend.
The howling men seem stuck in some early sexual stage -- a stage where manliness and sexuality are scary adult mysteries, the obsessive stuff of wild curiosity, rampant misunderstandings, crude jokes, dress-up play-acting, and bizarre fetishes. These guys have sexually scarcely moved beyond playing doctor-- scared kid[s] who still [haven't] come to terms with [their] own uncontrollable wet dreams.
Standing in the distinction of howling men (boys, teenagers, protracted teenagers, and young adults) imitating adult virility and competence, most often not by distinguishing the actual competence of being a grown adult competent at seduction and sexual behavior with another consenting grown adult -- which likely as not may have absolutely nothing to do with sexual archetypes, our children imitate that which can be imitated, and of course as children do, they take it to the extreme -- they imitate the outer archetypal displays, AND MISTAKE THE MAP FOR THE TERRITORY.
The children then proceed to defend this misidentified territory as if it were the Church of the Sacred Gato herself with libidinous worship services proceeding in full public view on the altar during Mass.
(Come early for best viewing of the sacrifice of the Sacred Virgin. (Virgins sacrificed at noon and 7 pm Mass; to apply to be a virgin submit an application to Sacrificial Mass Virgins or Altar Boys in Kilts. Please include experience & photo.)
Once you realize these children in youngster's bodies, brimming with hormones, are simply imitating their misunderstanding of what they believe is the magic power their father has -- why their Dad has always been so scary, so smart, so big, so tough, so able to TAKE Mother and make her cry, laugh, and make that strange face no one else can, and those funny noises Mommy makes which these boy-child-men only think about in the remote recesses of their thoughts and hands, jacking off hard in their bedroom at night, feeling dirty for imaging their best friend's mother that way (and with rare exceptions, not tracking the source of it back to their own mom.) These kids need somehow to become their Dads.
"Who do you want to be when you grow up, little man?" The only true answers are, "My Daddy" or "My mommy". Or in this multi-generational distributed world, an authentically appropriate replacement; accept NO substitutes.
Until we have fulfilled our destiny as boys and become our fathers, we are not grown men. We are incomplete. A similar dynamic takes place between daughters and mothers, although theirs is not as driven by an incomplete understanding of sexuality, and a need to prove oneself in the same way the male dynamic is. The biological and historical triggers are radically different, thus the mother-child relationship is different.
With this background, now the displays of Republican and non-feminist men make sense.
About six hours ago I started to write this post. Frankly, it was because I needed to balance a silly something I knew almost immediately I wasn't going to post, the Japanese Girl Bikini Rodeo Fight. It was cute, but just too porny for GNB. Which if it has been 60 seconds, fine. But it runs for seven minutes. Seven minutes of these girls in bikinis bouncing on sex machines throwing whipped cream pies at each other.
No, it really didn't take a lot of restraint not to post it. But for a minute there before I figured out it was just porn with whipped cream in bikinis, I figured I'd need some men to balance it or I'd have our female contingent screaming for Man with Ham. Which we're never going to post, no actual Man with Ham, (the lame photoshopping alone fills me with dread). But I looooove putting up Intern George, men in kilts, and (oh yeah you betcha) starlets.
I went looking for some men in kilts on YouTube me to post up. And found the one below about Maroi Haka v. Kilts. Which led me into this whole quest to figure out what the hell Maroi Haka was. Which led me into SIX HOURS now, no, damn, it's been EIGHT hours I've been up all freaking night! Aaaaargh. Eight.Freaking.Hours, taking Sara's beautiful post apart -- first I had to find it -- piece by bit by piece, and then putting it back together just the way I wanted it. This is all your fault too. Or my fathers.
Anyway, what we have below is video of this really cool thing these guys do at Rugby games. They challenge the other team using a Maroi ritual dance, which gets their team and fans ALL riled up. It's pretty groovy. You've no doubt seen similar displays when American Football or soccer teams take the field. The ritual pounding of the chests as the teams come together, and so on.
After having read the above, and seeing it acted out below, you're never going to see what's going on the same way again. Or, I suspect, participate in one of these rituals with quite the same degree of blind enthusiasm. *smiles*
Some of these repeat, sort of, as I show different aspects of the ritual. Some is historical. And some is just fun. It continues to build. You won't want to miss the two last ones. *grins*
Enjoy.
Kamate avec les paroles
Haka
Behind The All Blacks Haka
Maori Haka Competition in New Zealand
Maori Haka v Kilts
Kamate kamate! (The Haka, Gingerbread Remix)
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